You scroll through their Instagram feed, reply to their tweets, watch their TikTok videos and defend them no matter what they do … Are you simply a fan or something a little more?
Parasocial relationships are one-sided bonds people develop with public and media figures such as actors, musicians, influencers or politicians, although the term can also be applied to peers. Unlike developing a crush, those indulging in parasocial relationships feel they are friends with the person – that they know them and know what they’re thinking and feeling.
For Mulaney, whose white, middle-class, male-skewing supporters see him as a comedy visionary and relatable everyman, the very fact their hero was being criticised for the speed of his new romance was tantamount to blasphemy.
“People usually get into a parasocial relationship by falling in love with celebrities, famous people, influencers or even fictional characters,” says Helen Najar, hypnotherapist and well-being counsellor at Miracles wellness centre in Dubai. “They create unrealistic ideas about a person and feel as if they are part of their life. They can also be physically attracted to them and feel emotionally attached, so begin to give the other party much interest, time, and emotional energy.
“This is commonly seen with fans of celebrities, as they truly believe they know the person rather than understanding that they only know the character being presented by the person.”
What is a parasocial relationship?
Parasocial relationships have been around for as long as humans but under different names and guises. Behaviours that previous generations would have termed as ardent admiration for someone, or even a long-distance crush, would almost certainly these days be deemed parasocial.
The term was first coined by sociologists Donald Horton and R Richard Wohl in their 1956 paper Mass Communication and Para-Social Interaction, in which they said: “The crucial difference in experience obviously lies in the effective lack of reciprocity … The interaction, characteristically, is one-sided, non-dialectical and controlled by the performer.”
In short: you can like a particular celebrity all you want, but they’re not going to like you back.
Najar says: “This form of ‘relationship’ can give the individual a sense of belonging and that they are part of a group who shares their emotional connection of love and admiration with the said celebrity [character], which in a way normalises the relationship.”
The tipping point into obsession
Despite living in times of peak oversharing online, most people understand the parameters of their parasocial relationships. They know that Justin Bieber isn’t going to leave Hailey for them because they slid into his DMs, nor will Sonam Kapoor Ahuja invite them round for coffee because they admired her living room decor on Instagram.
“As with all things, good and bad co-exist and this can be seen when parasocial relationships tip into obsession, and this obsession or idealization of a character can affect both adults and children,” says Najar. “In children, this can become dangerous if the child idolizes a character and aspires to be like them, for example a certain character or celebrity’s body type.
Enjoying a healthy parasocial relationship: ‘They help people feel more connected.’
Hypnotherapist Helen Najar and psychologist Mina Shafik say the unprecedented levels of access into celebrities’ lives that modern technology has given followers has blurred the lines between what fans know about a public person and what they think they know. Photos: Miracles Dubai; Thrive Wellbeing Centre
The spotlight being shone on parasocial relationships also coincides with the pandemic, which caused people to be confined to their homes, and media and content consumption go through the roof. Similarly stuck in their mansions, celebrities started offering even more insights into their lives, including their homes, pets, meals and daily schedules. All of which made a desire on the part of the fan to “know more” seem less intrusive.
“The expansion of social media means people have unlimited access to a variety of platforms, entertainment sites and celebrities,” says Najar, “making the ability to feel connected to these celebrities otherwise private lives more attainable and socially acceptable.”
Time management refers to managing time effectively so that right time is allocated to the right activity. Managing your time well can lead to feelings of effectiveness and accomplishment, but you have to be consistent. Developing a method for managing your time and adjusting it regularly to meet your changing needs allows you to accomplish more at work and at home.
Scheduling time for work, relaxation and sleep may also contribute to improved health. Poorly managed time, on the other hand, can lead to feelings of frustration and stress affecting our overall wellness.
In the corporate world , employees must learn to manage their time effectively in order to achieve targets ahead of deadline and make a mark of their own. One who understands the value of time and plans well never feels overburdened and enjoys each task assigned.
Let’s go through some effective time management techniques;
- Set your priorities : make a “ Task plan” list and jot down all the urgent tasks that needs to be completed against the time slot assigned to each task. High priority tasks must be mentioned on the top followed by tasks which can be done a little later. Most importantly , make sure you stick to your task list.
- Understand the difference between urgent and important task: work management and time management go hand in hand. Break down your day into morning, afternoon and evening segment and assign each segment with tasks based on their priority and deadline .
- Plan ahead : Make it your habit to always make a plan way ahead of time too better organise and Excel in each task assigned . This will not only help you in finishing your work on time but also will help you in feeling less burdened.
- Set Realistic goals : Set achievable targets and goals for yourself
Time management is much more important than we think and plays a vital role in maintaining a good mental health.
Time Management and Stress
How you manage our time can either cause or alleviate stress. Interestingly, stress can be interpreted as positive or negative, depending on its intensity and frequency. Productive or positive stress, known as eustress, is a controlled amount of stress that produces a steady state of alertness that can help you focus, but without all the negative side effects of distress.
Too much negative stress can overwhelm you and in extreme cases, temporarily immobilize you making it feel impossible to accomplish your goals.
Stress causes the body to secrete adrenaline and cortisol, the stress hormone responsible for the “fight or flight” response. Just the right amount of adrenaline might help you to become more productive. However, high levels of stress for prolonged periods may have dangerous physical effects including high blood pressure, anxiety and heart disease. Chronic stress causes the body to slow digestion, raise heart rates and increase insulin levels in the blood.
Practicing yoga and meditation helps relieving stress and and clears our mind and strengthens our ability to focus. Many Companies incorporate onsite wellness programs to relieve stress of their employees.
A series of thoughts…to understand the realm of LBL, Hypnotherapy and Past Life Regression…
By Indrani Sinha Seth
She is the 1st and only LBL Hypnotherapist certified by The Newton Institute (TNI) – USA, full member of TNI, based in the MENA region.
Life Between Lives (LBL) ® Hypnotherapy is a deep hypnotic process which develops with the therapist guiding the client into a space of physical relaxation and the awareness is then guided to one’s inner realm. This enables the client to access his/her subconscious mind and then even higher levels of the mind.
The Newton Method of LBL Hypnotherapy is the result of more than 25 years of initial research by Michael Newton with over 7,000 of his clients – research that continues to build via TNI, the organization he developed to continue his work. It was designed to reconnect you with your soul self, your guiding beings and thereby awaken an understanding of your immortal identity.
Each of us is so much more than the physical body which we can see. Based on the understanding that a soul can experience multiple lifetimes, we believe we are a combination of the energies, experiences and learning’s of countless previous lives; each life a set of contrasting experiences that embody the variety of lessons our inner, eternal self seeks to learn in its quest for development and perfection. That core, eternal self, always searching for growth and new levels of understanding, is our soul self…
Michael Newton’s research enabled him to assemble a model of the spiritual realm. He documented consistent reports from thousands of clients of the existence and incredible support offered by countless Higher Beings in the inter-life; personal guides and teachers, all ready to guide each one of us through and between each life. This session enables us to access the wisdom and insights and gives us further clarity of our present life and the patterns that are unfolding.
This session gives you enlightenment, a more complete perception of who you really are as the sum total of your past lives, the collaboration of your soul with other souls and with its guides and teachers, and what you are learning now. A sense of the eternity of the soul…and an end to the fear of physical death…The beauty of the experience leaves the client with a sense of bliss and wonder…where as you move beyond the physical and experience the unbound and limitless it enables one to get answers for many of their present life issues, clarity about things that overwhelm them and control them, understand their life purpose and join the dots on many of the apparently coincidental experiences of their present journey.
The following is from one of my case studies…its part of the debriefing I usually do after the session. This beautifully sums up what an LBL gives us:-
What did the client gain from the session?
She shared about her realizations, her clarity about many of the questions she had discussed with me during the case briefing. There was much joy and celebration when she finished. The closures she seemed to have received on various issues in her very long and detailed session with her Council made her value this session. The session validated her work as well as her relationship with R___ (names withheld for client confidentiality) her present husband.
The spontaneous hug after the session and the glow on her face said it all!
-What did you learn from the session that will make you a better LBL Therapist?
Being a therapist who has always enjoyed and valued spiritual sessions, LBL sessions give me a deep sense of fulfillment every time I share one…I say share because it’s as much a spiritual learning and healing for a client as it is for a therapist.
In the moments of silence in a session where the client is in a deep inner dialogue with her/his guide/soul family member/Council there is a lot to observe and learn …the art of keeping quiet and seeing healing happen in your presence. Indeed a very blessed experience.
LBL sessions make a therapist realize (over and over again) that healing is between the client and her/his universe…as a therapist one is just a channel…a conduit.
Disharmony at home affects your productivity at office and disharmony at office causes rift at home. Offices are microcosm of humanity. They are a mix of all types of people with all types of personalities ,quirks, goals and challenges so for everyone to get along beautifully , it takes efforts.
Few key causes of disharmony at work
- Poor communication and consultation
- Poor leadership
- Absence of shared vision
- Poor leadership
- Mistrust leading to interpersonal conflict
- Lack of emotional intelligence
- Facing crossroads at work
Working towards harmony
- USE MEDITATION AS YOUR ANCHOR – Whenever we are at crossroads in our life or at work we generally experience higher levels of stress . In whichever situation stress seeps in, it becomes imperative to get it out of our system. Like in a life of a child for every solution he looks up to his mother or father, similarly meditation resolves every problem single handedly. Peace of mind, clarity of thought, reduction of stress and a more positive outlook on life are just some of the early benefits of meditation. Making meditation a part of our life not only brings out a change in us but also changes the environment around us as our perspective and vision changes.
- TEAM BUILDING WORKSHOPS – Hold regular team building workshops with the entire office and empower co-workers to take ownership in the business. If they feel their opinions and insights hold value, they will be more likely to use their talents and creativity to help build business as a whole and go a little extra mile to achieve company targets.
ORGANIZING FUN DAY AT WORK – It’s time to change the regular office job approach and make it a more likable place. In past few years we have seen a lot of positive changes in the office environment which not only concentrates on fulfilling company’s objectives but also gives importance to employees’ mental and physical well-being. Organise a day in a month, wherein employees get together and indulge in fun activities together. This will help in shrinking all their stresses , rejuvenate their minds and resolve professional conflicts and blocks that they face every day at office. Conduct activities like laughter yoga , Improv workshop , meditation , these activities will teach employees useful communication and soft skills like focus and trust.
When we talk about wellness, or wellbeing, we tend to always relate our wellness in respect to the absence of physical disease. We somehow disregard the simplest fact that this physical body of ours is what carries us, being the vehicle of our emotional and mental dimensions, hence this trinity we have come to call “I”.
Often our emotional and mental wellness goes unnoticed until it creates a certain piled up counterparts in the physical body or a certain limitations and struggles in the outside world. The physical body is directly connected and affected by every thought and emotion. For a moment try this simple exercise, invite into our present moment a certain worry or insecurity, and examine that heaviness on our physical body and our breath, we will come to realize how everything is so closely connected.
All bad habits that we strive to change, that are affecting our physical wellbeing, are deeply rooted in our emotional and mental bodies. We tend to make so much effort to break those habits, but often fail, for we forget to realize what emotional and mental states those habits are serving. Sometimes releasing an old emotional pain, or a negative belief, will effortlessly allow us to drop that habit, for it no longer serves any purpose.
The overall oneness and the alignment of our three bodies physical, emotional, and mental is what allow us to create an overall inner wellness; Which reflects into our immediate present surrounding, allowing us to create wellness in every dimension, whether health, career, love life, relationship, parenting, etc.
Which makes us wonder, Can I actually do well in all dimensions of my life? And this only possible if I create this inner balance which leads to inner wellbeing.
We always tend to believe life to happen to us, but we often forget, the power that we have to transform any situation by the way we react to that situation. The way we react is driven from within, driven by us, through us. The more centered we are within the less reactive we become to the outside world, and we start creating our desired outcomes more consciously.
Driven by love, and no longer fear ; for no longer are we driven by our weakness or our insecurities, for they no longer have power upon us.
In truth , simplicity and Love
Spiritual Response Therapy is a magnificent method used to heal a variety of issues ranging from anxiety, unhealthy relationship patterns, blocks to abundance and prosperity and disturbing health concerns. It works by researching and clearing programs in an individual at a core (beliefs from this lifetime), ancestral (beliefs passed down from generations), history (unhealthy beliefs from past lives), and soul level.
It is a method born from using a combination of hypnotherapy (dowsing method) and response therapy (identifying and clearing subconscious fears). It was created by a unity minister named Robert Detzler in the late 1980’s, who integrated his spiritual understanding with response therapy and discovered a powerful method that can clear challenges for individuals at a mental, emotional, physical level and spiritual level.
In SRT, we use a series of charts and a pendulum to research and clear programs and negative energies held in the Akashic Records. We identify the root cause of the issues, research their origin and go ahead and clear the unresolved emotional energy, reprogramming the soul and the subconscious to experience life with greater ease and positivity.
As an SRT Consultant, I have worked with SRT to help many clients in successfully clearing suppressed resentment, anxiety, depression, sexual abuse, narcissism, unhappy relationship patterns, low self-worth, confusion towards life purpose and self-limiting beliefs towards abundance, to name a few. The transformation in their behavior within a few sessions has been astonishing. Not only do the discordant thoughts forms they were holding on to no longer disturb them, but by sharing insights into how these behaviors came about in their lives, my clients have empowered themselves on many levels as well. They have become more mindful of their thoughts, enjoy the beats of life with a lot more ease and grace and move forward confidently towards their goals and aspirations. Hence, they attract more positive outcomes in their life as they come to understand that their subconscious and conscious mind need to work harmoniously together in order to attract the abundance they so desire!
Spiritual Response Therapy has transformed my life in many ways than one and aligned me to my life-purpose where I use my intuitive gifts and talents to serve humanity. And I now offer this gift to everyone by holding sessions at Miracles so that you all can enjoy abundance and most importantly come to reconnect with their Higher Self and become magnificent co-creators who bring forth divine blessings in this world.
Our lives are made up of many factors and influencers which can be overwhelming at time. So many things to achieve and gain and still manage day to day life. Since we become so focused on the areas of life as separate aspects, trying to bring them together and look at them holistically can be a tough job.
Seeking balance across work with family, gym with yoga, food with health and friends with volunteering can happen, we just need the right tools.
The various facets of our lives, such as relationships, environments, people, health, lifestyle and family all impact the condition of who we are at any given time. These aspects can be broken down into the segments of life which we can then assess in terms of impact and importance.
When an imbalance occurs, for example, one area of your life is dominating everything else such as when you work all the time and neglect your health, then steps can be taken to correct those areas of imbalance to support the life you desire. Holistically coaching can help to provide the means to step back and view your life as the sum of parts.
The reasons to try holistic coaching are:
1. Having someone to bounce ideas off – objectively and with clarity
When you speak to someone who is 100% focused on working with you to achieve your life goals and wants to support you on the journey of the life you want, then coaching can be really helpful. You may share these ideas with friends or family but to get to where you want to go, an independent person can probe your further and make you ask yourself the big questions.
2. Strategies and techniques to support in achieving your goals
A holistic coach provides you with a suite of tools which can be used to arrange, plan and map the life you want to achieve. Tools can include a life plan, vision and action boards, weekly plans, vision and mission statements.
3. The personal trainer for the mind
A coach of any kind, takes the talents you have and want to pursue, so that you can become the better you. Your personal trainer will make you work-out, learn how to exercise correctly and support you in your weight-loss or body-building plan. The holistic coach does the same thing for the other areas of your life – life purpose, business life, creative life, social life, love life and makes you work to achieve the goals you want in these area.
4. Creating a dedicated, safe, trusting and open environment
A holistic coach creates an environment which is welcoming, safe, open and trusting. The information shared between client and coach is kept confidential and not shared. The client has the opportunity to be open and express their dreams, desires and aspirations in a non-judgemental and professional environment.
5. Help in overcoming the obstacles, low confidence and negative self-talk
You may know what you want and that you deserve it but your language, self-talk and low self-esteem may be stopping you. Holistic coaching allows you to identify these limiting beliefs and share ways to change the way you use words and think. You no longer say, “I am no good at public speaking” to “with each presentation I make, my public speaking skills improve”
Through holistic coaching, we work with you to assess the current state of your life and identify the areas of life you wish to focus upon. A proactive plan is then implemented to allow you to take the steps to achieve your plan. We provide you with tools required to support you in this process.
“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream” C.S. Lewis
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